Why Do We Volunteer for Jobs That Drive Us Mad? The Referee’s Dilemma—And What It Really Teaches about Life

Are you ever sucked into doing something you know will end in hassle, complaints, and far too much drama… but you do it anyway? If you’re nodding right now, stick with me for a few minutes—this one’s for you.

I’m Kevin, the Runpreneur, and as part of my 4,292-day Runpreneur Challenge to run 40,075km (the circumference of our planet!) and raise £1,000,000 for children’s causes, I don’t shy away from the tough stuff—on or off the road. Today, let’s dive into the unsung world of grassroots football refereeing, and why on earth I keep saying yes to a job that nearly everyone else avoids.

The Hidden Side of Volunteering: Why Be a Referee?

You’d think lacing up your boots to referee under-14s football would be decent fun, right? Let me be honest: most days, after blowing the final whistle, I seriously ask myself: Why do I bother?

It’s hassle, plain and simple. Every decision scrutinised. Everything you do benefits one side, and antagonises the other. Week after week, I step onto the pitch knowing I’m signing up for a pressure cooker of flared tempers—parents, coaches, kids, you name it.

But I keep returning. Here’s why…

More Than Just Blowing the Whistle

For years, I’ve coached and refereed grassroots football—right from mini-leagues up to Colts level (that, kids from roughly 10–16 years old in UK football). My eldest has now hit 14, and I started doing all this back when he was only 6.

When I began, children’s football was all about smiles, fun, and muddy knees. These days, the pitch feels bigger, the tackles harder, and the stakes (in everyone’s minds, at least) so much higher. I’ve refereed top-level under-10s that are just as fiercely competitive as any under-13s or under-14s. The line between supporting your child and living vicariously through their games gets seriously blurred.

People ask: Why take on such grief? You’re not even paid!

Because here’s the bottom line: without referees, there is no game. Someone has to do it—and I know I’m fair, thick-skinned, and determined to keep matches honest and safe for everyone.

The Dark Side: Pressure, Toxicity & Lost Joy

Let’s not sugar-coat things. Children’s sport—especially football—has developed an edge I don’t remember from my own childhood. The expectation and pressure boil over from the adults on the sidelines, and it infects the kids and officials too.

I’ve seen “friendly” matches morph into nerve-shredding battles where every decision triggers a mini-uproar. Yes, even in under-10s! Everyone cares so much about the result, yet all I want is for the kids to run, play, enjoy, and grow in confidence—from the shyest defender to the star striker.

But week in, week out, I return. I do my best, call it as I see it. I don’t care if the home teams, my kid’s side—I ref every match straight down the line. That sometimes makes me the villain to the parents behind me. I’ve given a penalty against my own team and been well and truly “told off” by the crowd for it. Honestly, I’ve copped more grief in one Sunday morning than most people get in a week in the office.

Why I Referee Anyway (And Why You Might Too)

So why keep going? Here’s the truth: because it MATTERS. If good people don’t step up, games get out of control. Kids get hurt, lessons go untaught, and the spirit of football erodes.

I believe in football as a force for good—a way for kids to move, socialise, and learn respect and teamwork away from screens. I referee because it’s essential to the game and to the community. I explain my decisions. I call out unsporting behaviour, whether from a player, coach, or parent. I take the stick, but I hold the line.

Call me strange. (I call it passionate.) If you’ve ever done a job like this, you’ll know what I mean: it’s about being useful, adding value, and taking the heat so everyone else can play, learn, and eventually—even the angry ones—enjoy themselves.

My Challenge & Mission: Running for More Than Myself

Just like my daily runs—now well past day 1,699 and aiming for 4,292—I show up, rain or shine. The mission? £1,000,000 for children’s lives. Refereeing, like running, is a commitment to something bigger than my comfort zone.

Would I love your support? Absolutely. Every like, share, comment and donation pushes us a step closer to that million-pound goal. Every bit of attention saved for grassroots football—where it’s needed most—makes a massive difference.

So next time you see someone doing the “thankless” job, remember: without them, nothing happens. Maybe join them. Maybe thank them. And remember, every whistle blown for fairness is worth the hassle—and then some.

Let’s keep football for kids—fun, safe, and spirited. And let’s keep the mission running, together!

Drop your thoughts below: have you ever volunteered for a “nightmare” role others wouldn’t? What did it teach you? I reply to every comment.